It Takes a Family [Day Three & Four]

See ITAF Recap Days 1-2 HERE

Day Three

Day Three had four more lectures, and would be our last day to absorb all that we possibly could from such knowledgeable resources.

Bill Duncan gave a lecture on “The Law of Marriage and Parenthood.” We learned about the legal transformation of parenthood, the default definitions and how the norm was being questioned and challenged. Bill did a great job of showing us some court cases that sought to redefine what it means to be a parent and how it belittles the needs of children, often putting them in harmful situations. We looked at cases in which abusers ended up with custody, and how children were treated more like consumer goods than blessed biological responsibilities.

Brad Wilcox spoke on “Marriage, The Gold Standard for Children: An International Perspective from the Social Sciences.” It was eye opening to see how cultures around the world are doing with this redefinition of family and marriage. Most of them are not excelling with such ideology, and he pointed out that it is the “elite wisdom” of the rich and famous that ends up trickling down and mostly affecting the poorer, lower classes with the most tragedy.  He showed us statistics from Europe to South America of how children in “broken” homes are more likely to experience negative outcomes such as depression, failure to complete education, and feeling distressed.  Through the information and research provided, it is clear that we must support traditional marriage if for no other reason than the hope of our children.

“The Bible and Homosexual Practice: Key Issues,” presented by Robert Gagnon was a refreshing and challenging take on what how the bible holistically discusses homosexuality.  Going through the Bible from beginning to end, he touched on three main arguments including Paul’s ignorance, and fear of upsetting male dominance- which after discussing we see there are no historical possibilities of these being true arguments.

Our last lecture came from Dr. Jennifer Roback Morse, speaking on “It Takes A Family to Raise a Village.” She was very straightforward in describing what we are going against in this fight for marriage. Mostly, the “Condomists” and their disregard of biology in favor of poor ideology, pushing contraception as the ideal method of promoting recreational, sterile, amoral sex (an impossible way to view sex in reality). She showed us how this viewpoint is neither sustainable nor economical. Her last challenge to us for the weekend was for us to 1. Keep the Faith, 2. Inform ourselves, 3. Speak Out, and 4. Show up (KISS). We need to get past differences and work towards intelligently understanding and educating on this issue.

At the end of the night, we had a time of hearing from other students and discussing issues on identifying and addressing the needs in order to win this battle for our families. It was a very encouraging hearing from other students and the movements (big or small) on their campuses and in their communities. Some of them showed tremendous amounts of courage and fought for what is right.

“Frightened hearts have perfect skin, courageous hearts are wounded.” –Cambodian proverb.

We dismissed for the evening, which was a sad moment. We had become a sort of family ourselves, and when you go through such intense training with a like minded group of people, the camaraderie becomes deep. You see that while you might be alone in your part of the country or campus, on a grand scheme, there are others in the same boat as you. This feeling of being together with people who understand, it is priceless.

The next day, Sunday, Dr J invited students to come hang out at a boat club on Mission Bay while we wait for our planes. It was such a great afternoon, and I couldnt grasp the wonderful hospitality! I loved it.

That night I spent at a hostel in downtown San Diego, which was pretty cool, and pretty small. The roommate that I met was this crazy German girl who was fired from her au paire job, which is awkward, but ok. She had crazy hair. 

Monday morning, I hopped on the bus and headed to the airport. Long flight later to Boston, and early morning drive to Providence, and I was back.  

Before this weekend, I would have balked at common arguments against the purpose of one man and one woman coming together in marriage for procreation and protection. I would have been hesitant to join in certain conversations. Now after sitting under such good teaching, I feel prepared and equipped to dive right in as someone intelligently informed. I have met people who have challenged and encouraged, exhorted, and admonished me towards understanding and truth.

Leaving San Diego was a sad time, but it comes with much hope. We can win this. If we fight for truth, we can save our families.